Sex, blogging and why bad reviews aren’t the end of the world

round-rating-buttonsThe other week, over a tongue-slackening bottle of wine, I had a rather enlightening conversation with a PR regarding the nature of blogging. And in the process I had my wrists slapped a couple of times for, would you believe it, speaking my mind? Why, they wanted to know, would I bother to criticise a product if I didn’t I didn’t like it when I could simply not mention it at all?

That, I told them politely, is a little like turning a blind eye to an injustice and hoping someone else will speak out because you’re too afraid. I know, I know, the two aren’t entirely comparable but I had been drinking remember. The sad fact is, though, bloggers do have every reason to be afraid. I have, in the course of saying what I think, been blacklisted (after one critical post a company I’d been in regular contact with for over five years promptly removed me from their mailing list) and I’ve incurred the wrath of more than one overly-sensitive PR for a less-than-flattering product review. Worse still, on occasion I’ve simply had the silent treatment when I send emails to PRs, which is essentially the beauty industry equivalent of waterboarding.

As I explained to the PR I was discussing the subject with, though, to me a degree of objectivity is absolutely crucial for credibility. In print journalism (and I’m talking about beauty journalism specifically here) there is a convention that everything is wonderful. This lipstick’s gorgeous, that aftershave balm’s fantastic etc, etc. But then, when you have advertisers breathing down your neck how are you going to say something doesn’t work, smells rank or stripped a couple of layers of skin off your face?

The thing is, as readers become increasingly more sophisticated in how they consume information – and increasingly sceptical in the process – the ‘love all, hate nothing’ mentality so prevalent in the beauty industry simply won’t wash. Indeed, I strongly suspect it’s why so many people prefer to access product information via blogs rather than print media these days.

What I don’t understand is why some brands and some of their PRs freak out so much when they read a less than glowing review, why they can’t roll with the punches and why they can’t see the bigger picture. When a brand has a reality outage over a bad review I’ve written I often point them in the direction of a review of another of their products where I’ve been quite beside myself with adoration.

Don’t get me wrong, some do ‘get it’ (I often receive emails saying “we know you weren’t keen on X but are sure you’ll like Y” which is great – and perfectly reasonable – approach). These people understand that you’re bound to take a hit sometimes and that in actual fact, being critical of some things makes praise of others all the more powerful when it comes.

I’m sure lots of bloggers will disagree with me about being openly critical and there will be others, perhaps those just starting out, who are too nervous to upset big brands, especially since so many are now clamouring to “work with” us.  I  totally understand that, and that the beauty about blogging is that everyone can do their own thing. There are lots of bloggers out there whose aim is simply to alert their readers to the availability of a product and who leave any opinion at the coatcheck. And that’s totally fine. I read them and enjoy them, and as with news channels, there are times when not having an opinion is a good idea.

Personally, though, I like to hear what a blogger thinks about a product. One of the things I love about Amazon is the glorious array of conflicting reviews. Look up your favourite album and there’ll be people saying it’s the best thing ever recorded while others will say they hurled it out of their car window in utter disgust. What this array of opinions gives you is perspective. And you need that just as much if you’re thinking of buying a moisturiser or massively-hyped new fragrance as when you’re buying a new TV, car or home insurance.

So to all the brands and PRs out there who still flip out at anything less than a glowing product review I say this: reviews are like sex. Sometimes great, sometimes average, sometimes downright disappointing. But you should never write off a lover just because of one bad experience.

5 great Valentine’s Day fragrances for women

Fancy buying the woman in your life a fragrance for Valentine’s Day but not sure where to begin? Don’t worry, I’ve made it easy for you by asking some of my favourite beauty industry pals what they’d recommend…chaneljpegJane Cunningham, founder of britishbeautyblogger.com:  Chanel No5, from boots.com

“It’s the classic floral you cannot go wrong with, not least because every woman in the world would like to think she deserves Chanel and she’ll love the fact you realise that!”

westwoodlLauren Naylor, The Sun’s Beauty Expert: Vivienne Westwood Boudoir, from escentual.com

“If you want to get in your woman’s good books, opting for a designer fragrance like this is a sure fire way, especially when the bottle looks so goddamn exquisite. She’ll love you for choosing such a quintessentially English brand too.”

moleculesNadine Baggott, Health and Beauty Editor of HELLO! Magazine: Escentric Molecules Molecule 01, from liberty.co.uk

“If you want to indulge your partner in a scent that works for you as well then go for this one by maverick nose Geza Schoen. I never tire of this unisex, pheromone-based, mossy, light-as-air scent.”

amyrisLynnette Peck Bateman, Beauty Director of Saga magazine: Amyris Femme by Francis Kurkdjian, from selfridges.com

“If you’re looking for a unique and imaginative gift for a more sophisticated woman I’d recommend this warm powdery scent with hints of citrus. It’s not by one of the large cosmetic houses so also has the advantage that it won’t be worn by every other woman in the world.”

avedaJacqui Ripley, beauty writer, author and Dolly Mixture blogger: Aveda Pure-Fume Ancient Attar, from aveda.co.uk

“In its presentation it’s low-key and mindful rather than a big splashy blockbuster. It smells natural on the skin too, with Bulgarian Rose being at its heart. Gives the sentiment of love without being predictable.”